7:20 a.m. -- After generally uneventful morning, managed to get 5-year-old onto the bus fully clothed and with a reasonably healthy lunch packed.
8:30 a.m. -- Received call from school informing that 5-year-old would be returning at 11:15 a.m. because ice would be shooting from the sky.
8:31 a.m. -- Did frantic math to figure out whether needed to reschedule 3-year-old's well child doctor visit in town 45 minutes away. Decided to chance it. Prepared alibi in case of failure.
9:30 a.m. -- Entered 3-year-old's doctor's office with said child in full Batman regalia. Was clearly relegated to role of Alfred. Story previously disclosed.
11:00 a.m. -- 3-year-old deposited to daycare facility JUST UNDER THE WIRE.
11:15 a.m. -- Resumed custody of 5-year-old. No ice. Many chores and missed schoolwork duties completed.
11:16 a.m. through 4:40 p.m. -- NO. FRIGGING. ICE.
4:00 p.m. -- Resumed custody of 3-year-old. Returned to vehicle from daycare facility to find 5-year-old reading a dinosaur book with his gentleman's bits having a walkabout. Was informed there wasn't enough room in his pants for them. Drummed forehead repeatedly against vehicle.
4:20 p.m. -- After world's fastest grocery run, attempted to check out. Card refused. After consultation with bank and much confusion on both parts, came to light there was banking error on the part of husband. The one who is out of town. And not standing at a busy grocery store register with the world's loudest Batman and his annoying older brother who has a single minded determination to defy physics and flip over any grocery buggy he comes in contact with. OUT. OF. TOWN. (Banking error corrected, access to money fully restored.)
4:45 p.m. -- World's earliest dinner because everyone was oh god dying of starvation. Did not care. Denied request for cheese on 5-year-old's happy dog bun, because he was having mac-and-cheese as a side already. Went to change clothes in dryer. Returned to find this loophole created by the tiny lawyer.
|He's going to make his frat brothers so proud someday.|
5:15 p.m. -- Engaged in discussion with 5-year-old regarding the nature of T-shirts (they look like the letter T). Held arms out to demonstrate. Was informed the shirt did not make a T because my stomach was "too fat" and made a bump, and the letter T has no bump. After much discussion about why one should never say that to a person ever, much less to one's own mother, came to discover he meant my boobs.
6:20 p.m. -- Received makeover.
Calm down cartoon and bedtime engaged early. Several cookies consumed. Forgot to hit the wine store after bank card debacle. Trying to console self with Cherry 7-Up and pretending it's some sort of exotic cocktail.